||[Jul. 4th, 2005|10:42 pm]
As a baby I was baptized Catholic. Soon my spiritual path diverted itself, if at the age of 1 a person could have a spiritual identity. After I was adopted at the age of 5, I entered into a congregational church. The atmosphere of the church did not meet my parents spiritual needs.
My parents being fairly alternative in their beliefs, decided to be part of a spiritual alternative group called Seekers and Sojourners, that they, along with friends founded. The building that they chose to have the group was something that intrigued a young child, me. Though I was young I was able to absorb some of the groups morals. My family is very musically oriented. In this musical environment I was able to be involved as a small child. I retained some basic principles that has become an important staple in who I am and my spiritual life today.
Non-violence and acceptance of everyone was ingrained in me as soon as I came to live with my family. Being part of a socially alternative family was a major contributor to me for learning that equality and non-violence were essential in life. Being part of a family with two wonderful women gave me a perspective that in a traditional household I would probably not have obtained.
Through Seekers and Sojourners I came to my first spiritual awakening. I remember going to an ash grove and with the rest of the group dispersed and went to meditate. Here I was introduced to my first Buddhist experience. I have never really prayed in the traditional Christian way. I don’t think that I have ever been what one would call defined in my spiritual journey.
Seeker and sojourners sadly separated after several years. For a while I don’t remember being part of any spiritual environment. That remained true until we went to another Congregational church that my family has participated in steadily ever since.
I used to attend this church ever Sunday, until I found a weekend job. During the time that I had attended this church, I found my spiritual path needed to be obtained by different means. Though I learned a lot through the Bible teachings and Christian song, never really identified with the ‘Christian way’. I’ve always enjoyed the teaching in the Bible, but I have never really come to identify my place in its pages.
I recently felt as though I was falling off the face of the earth. I found my self dealing with self absorption and self-destruction. I have become lost in my spiritual identify. If I were to label myself I would be a syncretist. Though I still have my basic spiritual principles learned from my childhood, my faith has become weak. At the moment I am on quest to find my spiritual identity. In this time self-discovery and self-healing I am open to finding my faith and my place in spirituality.